It seems that in our generation, chivalry is difficult to come by. Women expect less from men, and men offer less to women. Women are surprised when a man takes them out to a fancy dinner, or even opens the car door for them.
What happened to men wining and dining their women, spoiling them and providing for them? What happened to the knight in shining armor that’s supposed to save them? Some women think the answer is that men have become assholes, but I don’t think that’s the truth. My theory is that chivalry is dying because women are killing it themselves. We don’t allow men the chance to be chivalrous.
The answer is simple: women don’t need to be saved anymore. Better yet, women don’t WANT to be saved anymore. Gen-Y women do what we want and do not apologize for it. The real issue is that in order for chivalry to exist, women must be ladylike and fragile. Chivalrous men are looking to take care of a woman, and women who are looking to be taken care of are hard to come by nowadays.
Chivalry existed when women were seen as helpless. Men were raised to believe that it was their job to receive an education, have their own career and make enough money to provide for their woman’s wants and needs. Women were raised to believe that it wasn’t necessary to get an education or worry about a career as long as they married rich.
Men still receive their education and make enough money to provide for women. Women still have the opportunity to skip an education and marry rich. So what has changed? Women don’t want to settle for marrying rich. If I’m driving a Benz, I want to know it’s my own.
Women are craving success. We are no longer content with getting whatever the f*ck we want from men in return for our independence. It may seem like the perfect life: sit back, do nothing, and let a man give you everything you want. Truthfully, women who settled for this life gave a lot in return. We were supposed to be innocent and harmless. This idea is what makes Gen-Y women feel so judged for doing what they want.
Guys love the idea of having a girl who is innocent and untouched. They always complain about how girls are becoming “bros” because they smoke too much weed, have sex too often, etc. The problem is that girls have less desire to be innocent.
On the other hand, by no means have all our morals disappeared. I respect myself and set boundaries for myself all the time. The difference is that I set boundaries based on what I feel is best for myself, not because I am trying to please someone else. That is what more women are inclined to do in Gen-Y.
It is not as easy to impress a woman with money anymore. It is easy for us to see right through someone who is trying to impress us with money and has nothing else to offer. What we look for now is personality. If and when we decide to be in a relationship, we want someone to have fun with and someone to trust; a best friend who we are also attracted to. Not someone to take care of us.
I’m not encouraging men to become douchebags and treat women badly. Women appreciate when a man respects them and cares for them. All I am saying is that it is a level playing field, and that both sexes should mutually respect and care for each other. Chivalry is not dead; it’s just less relevant in Generation-Y.